Caught Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Fiji Sea

It was bound to happen eventually. The point where I realised that this is no longer a short holiday but more something that should be taken seriously. It actually didn’t take that long for me to crack.

I’ve always thought of myself as a fairly strong person – strong will, strong head and strong heart. I try not to let things shake me too easily and instead just try to think of the positive. But one day in Fiji everything that could have gone wrong did go wrong. And it was then that I realised that I needed to change things up.

It started with a failed attempt to visit some waterfalls. We walked for a loooong time down some uneven dirt roads, not knowing where we were going. Faced with broken bridges and shallow flowing rivers we persevered, hoping that the end result would be worth it. When we got there and were told we’d have to pay 30 Fijian Dollars each ($17) for the privilege of seeing the falls we decided the end result would definitely NOT be worth it. Which meant we had to walk back the whole way we had come in the increasingly hot sun.

Round two found us searching for a nice beachy coastline. It can’t be that hard… we’re in Fiji, right? Wrong. As we were staying on the mainland there actually aren’t that many great beaches, but there are a couple attached to private resorts. So we headed down to one of them in search of some sand. This involved a lengthy bus ride and a very lengthy walk in what was now the scorching sun. We got to the resort. We found the sand. A tiny little strip of it with no sunbeds lying in front of what appeared to be a row of residential houses.

Ever more defeated, we decided to give up the search for the beach and head into the nearest city. Hungry and thirsty we went looking for somewhere to grab something to eat. All of the decent places were already starting to close and there was absolutely nowhere that offered the internet access we had been craving. We grabbed some overpriced food and made our long and dusty way back to our hotel in the darkness.

Once we got back I jumped into the shower and only then did I realise just how badly I had got sunburned that day. It was bad. I hadn’t been so careless in the sun since I was about 19 when I got minor sunstroke in Corfu. I was so frustrated and upset at myself that I had got so burnt on such a pointless day that I cried. All of the disappointment of the last day had caught up to me. It was then that it dawned on me that I had been treating this trip like any other short holiday I have ever taken. I was mounting pressure on myself and others to have a great time all of the time, because it would soon be over and I would soon be back at home, wishing I was away again. But I wouldn’t be home again soon. And sometimes things do go wrong, both at home and abroad, and you need to pick yourself up and start afresh the next day.

So I told myself that I needed to start viewing this trip as my life now, not just an extended vacation. It would be the only way I could get myself into a routine so as to avoid major self-inflicted disappointments again. It isn’t a bullet-proof solution by any means and I have no doubt that there will still be bumps in the road, as there would have been had I stayed in Manchester, but hopefully my sanity will remain in tact (what little there was left of it in the first place).

I’ll let you know how I get on.