“Hey, hey lady…..you want to go fast lady?”
Erm, aren’t I already going fast?
Flopping around in a rubber tube after a gargantuan buffet breakfast wasn’t the smartest move I’d made that holiday. But hey, I had gotten free admission because I was a guest at the Jumeirah Beach Hotel and I never pass up the opportunity to do something for free.
It was Dubai. It was November 2008. I was making a stopover in the city on my way to Sri Lanka and the sun was baking hot. I was in a rubber ring floating down what was a not-so-lazy river in the Wild Wadi Water Park. And even though Dubai is now full of tourists, my fair skin and blonde hair were still attracting attention from locals and workers at the water park.
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“Weeee, here you go…..going fast!!”
This was one of the park attendants whose job it is to spin you around and make your ride even more ‘enjoyable’. Black rubber isn’t exactly the most comfortable material in 90 degree heat, even in the water, and I was squeaking around like a hamster in an un-oiled wheel. But I do have to say that the river rapids were by far my favourite part of the water park. I unfortunately couldn’t take a ride on the Jumeirah Sceirah flume, the ride that most people visit the park for that travels at speeds of up to 80km/h because I was wearing a t-shirt. Sun cream was no match for the water and it was just too hot to go without. Having said that, at least I couldn’t have been as uncomfortable as the local women wearing black burkhas while their husbands and children splashed around in the water. It’s them I really feel sorry for.
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But having to battle the crowds was my own fault. As a hotel guest you are allowed access to the water park an hour before anyone else, which means you practically get the place to yourself. However, after the aforementioned breakfast I just couldn’t bring myself to get in the water straight away. So by the time I made it into the park there were only a few minutes before the locals came pouring through the gates. And I mean pouring. It was a Friday, so the kids were off school and boy were they ready to party. Unfortunately their definition of “partying” meant elbowing people out of the way as they excitedly ran to the ride of their choice. Cue grouchy Julia that has a small-child-strangling tendency.
Having said that, being the big kid that I am, I still gleaned maximum enjoyment out of running with them full pelt to get to the wave pool just as the generator was starting. I’ll never grow out of that tradition. Ever since I was knee high to a grasshopper, there has been something about a wave machine that has gotten me as excited as 50 Cent in the candy shop. And after I had survived near-drowning (it’s no fun if you don’t think you’re going to inhale too much water at least once) I went and laughed at the hilarious results of people trying to stand up on the surfboard machine. From a safe distance, where the attendants couldn’t get me to join in. What do I look like? Some kind of idiot?
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I have to say that the water park was a great way to spend a few hours, especially because I got free admission as a hotel guest. However, looking at the current prices it is around £35 ($55) per adult for entrance to the park and I really don’t think it’s worth that price because once you’ve been on each of the rides once, it gets a bit repetitive. I would say that if you can get free admission then by all means go; you will certainly have a good time. But if like me you would rather save the cash, simply just jump into your hotel pool and splash around in the water for a bit. It’s no wave machine but it’ll do. Plus you’ll have extra money to spend on poolside margaritas. Score.
All photos courtesy of Sarah_Ackerman on Flickr
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